BeatBlog

2010-09-30T14:31:00.005-04:00

John Hamm and James Franco in a film about Ginsberg. Sounds right up our alley.

2010-01-24T05:03:00.000-05:00

If only we'd known

"Snakes and monkeys are subjected to the demon more than other animals. Satan lives in them and possesses them. He uses them to deceive men and to injure them."

-- Martin Luther

2009-09-30T17:59:00.003-04:00

I saw that the latest post was from July, and thought I should add a little something. But then I realized I had nothing to add. I have found that more of my time is spent reading about The Big Lebowski than watching it or following its guidance. I am become Maude.

2009-07-27T04:21:00.001-04:00

One Fast Move or I'm Gone: Kerouac's Big Sur

2009-06-14T11:09:00.003-04:00

Things you hear on a Sunday morning...

Neighbor outside, pumping up pellet rifle...
*pffft* fires
Neighbor: "oh fuck!"

2009-06-05T20:46:00.001-04:00

I get to feel like an adult tonight. I'm drinking wine on my balcony and watering my tomato plants...except, now my neighbors are listening to early Will Smith rap...and Metz is coming tonight.

2009-05-24T07:36:00.002-04:00

Where is the Beat Flag? I have a mortar now, it fires bowling balls, but I just don't feel that I'm getting the real benefit of owning such a piece of equipment without also having a flag.

2009-05-14T12:41:00.001-04:00

http://www.latfh.com/

PBR and Red Dog aren't what they used to be.

2009-05-01T15:35:00.002-04:00

Ten and Six (formerly the Narrows) released a new EP today (download free or buy a CD for $5)

We also put a music video out on YouTube. Here it is:

2009-04-18T07:05:00.009-04:00

"I cannot bear it!" said the pewter soldier. "I have shed pewter tears! It is too melancholy! Rather let me go to the wars and lose arms and legs! It would at least be a change. I cannot bear it longer! Now, I know what it is to have a visit from one's old thoughts, with what they may bring with them! I have had a visit from mine, and you may be sure it is no pleasant thing in the end; I was at last about to jump down from the drawers."

- Hans Christian Andersen, "The Old House"

2009-03-30T21:20:00.002-04:00

The reactions to the recent Beat article amuse me.

2009-03-26T21:10:00.002-04:00

Here's the link and the text below the link if you're to lazy to click on things.

http://media.www.hillsdalecollegian.com/media/storage/paper1270/news/2009/03/26/Arts/The-Beat-3684052.shtml

The Beat

Betsy Woodruff

Issue date: 3/26/09 Section: Arts

One chilly night in 2006, a few guys who had had too much to drink ran across campus and stood defiantly on the steps of Central Hall in an act of protest against Hillsdale College's conservative policies.

They were naked.

They lived at The Beat, 187 N. West St., which, for more than a decade, won a reputation from student residents often described as non-traditional. The residents had their fair share of claims to fame: their affinity for postmodern philosophy, a mission to crash all unacceptably lame parties, and Beat poetry nights helped them gain status -- and a legacy -- as one of Hillsdale's most influential off-campus houses.

Dave Frank '06 gave a simple explanation of life at The Beat: "People walked around with their pants off a lot. It was a very open, non-judgmental place for spontaneous conversations about philosophy. A very cool group of snarky nerds living there."

Alexis Boylan '06, who dated Jon Gibbons, one of the residents, gave a slightly different description of the house:

"When I was a junior and my parents dropped me off - I lived a couple houses down - the first thing we saw was a pirate flag. And all my friends were sitting on the porch drinking 40s, completely wasted, with a cat that had one eye sitting on their lap and they were blaring the Old Crow Medicine Show. Some of them were wearing pants, some of them were not. That right there sums it up. First thing I saw when I rode into town."

Though it was never at a loss for factors to distinguish it from the rest of campus, the group's affinity for postmodern philosophy and literature helped set it apart. Heidegger, Sartre, Camus and Derrida all inspired the thinking of the students who lived there.

"Hillsdale's all about, 'Truth is truth and God is God and right is right and wrong is wrong,'" Frank said. "We were much more relativistic, like, things are much more situational and complicated. We sneered at this concept of eternal principals and stuff like that."

"I think that's what made us sort of odd at Hillsdale," said Jon Gibbons '06, who currently teaches English in Argentina. "We were very, very relaxed and open, we hung out with whoever."

"My senior year, I was trying to convince everyone of my philosophy based on the concept of the abyss, that man is continually separated from meaning by a gigantic abyss," Frank said. "I always talked about the abyss. Jon [Gibbons] was convinced that life was absurd, a giant joke."

The Beat's residents certainly embraced absurd behavior.

They found a large, wheeled laundry receptacle, like the kind hotels use for dirty linens.

Originally, it held kegs, but one night they decided to draw obscenities on the side of it and dub it the Danger Cart.

"We went around to various parties, we dressed in the same outfits, we had matching jackets and caps, and we would go around and take the Danger Cart with us and just jump out and yell 'Danger Crew!' and start yelling at people and drinking," Frank said.

Boylan rode in the cart quite a bit that night.

"We were not with it. We were not of the right mind," she said. "We would just jump in it, roll it up the stairs to the party, run around, jump back in it and roll out."

This behavior puzzled onlookers.

Boylan remembers hearing questions like, "Why are you out, 22-years-old, rolling around in a cart? What's the matter with you? Are you really drunk at 3 p.m. on a Thursday?"

The Danger Crew was satisfied with the results of their exploits.

"It worked very well, every time," Boylan said. "They were a creative bunch. They were

special."

Gibbons agreed.

"We decided that we had this gift, even if people didn't recognize it -- like Dada art is art even if people don't recognize it as art -- for taking the party to the next level," he said. "We would descend on a party. If it was well below our party standards, the people had difficulty getting acclimated to the new party atmosphere we would create."

One of the most infamous legends about The Beat involves a few students sitting in a canoe parked on the roof of the house and drinking beer.

"The landlord would always remind us about it every time we came around to sign the lease, that that was not allowed," said Ryan Leng '08, who lived there from 2005 to 2007.

They also enjoyed throwing No-Pants parties. When the small turnout of one of these parties disappointed them, they decided to spread the word about it.

"There was also a Mu Alpha party that night, so we went there without our pants on to let people know what was going on, a public service announcement if you will," Gibbons said.

"When you see one of The Beat men without their pants on, most people are taken aback. Especially Dave [Frank]. Dave has this comfort with his own body that is enviable," Gibbons continued. "But we were just here there to steal food and be nice. I think we were extra gentlemanly without our pants."

But not everyone agreed, he added.

"The Beat guys weren't really all that popular on campus," Gibbons said. "No one would be like, 'Oh it was such a great party because this Beat guy was there.' They'd be like, 'It was a great party and this Beat guy stole a lot of alcohol.'"

The Beat guys also tended to dislike the residents of The Bench, an off-campus house that was usually their destination in the Danger Cart.

"Generally, we hated The Bench," Frank said. "Even though we were huge nerds, we saw them as wannabes, and were very disgusted with their attempts to do what we thought would be cool. We were very rude to them, generally speaking. They thought they were cool because they were drinking, and we were like, 'Smoke some weed, guys.' Everything they did was slightly childish and not as cosmopolitan as we were."

Gibbons noticed a bit of a rivalry between the two houses.

"We felt a little peeved about the name -- monosyllabic names for off-campus housing, that's our territory, especially if they start with the letter 'b,'" he said. "And we felt a lot of times that there was an unspoken 'We're going to outdo you.'"

Boylan noticed the conflict as well, saying, "They were two houses that were competing for parties and therefore had this weird conflict. And The Bench was a little more conservative, a little more religious -- religious period, whereas The Beat was not."

They had a few conflicts with the administration.

"I think the most trouble we ever got in was when I was confronted by the dean," Frank said. "He thought I was the leader of the houses and said the house was becoming a drug haven and so we had to cut it out."

"Any time that you were chastised by the institution, it makes you more desirable," Gibbons said. "And so a lot of times I got the idea that the dean didn't know what we were doing, like, 'Well, I hear you guys have a 19th-century-style opium den going on in there.' Not exactly, no."

On the night of one of their Beat poetry reads, according to Frank, they decided to run around naked. Because one of the original inhabitants of the Beat was there and more girls were attending than usual, they were particularly eager for adventure.

They ran naked through the house a few times to warm up, and then decided to tour the campus.

First stop: the Sigma Chi house. Unfortunately, the house mom answered the door. Surprised and disappointed, they moved on to their next destination: Central Hall.

"We went to Central Hall to make a statement, overly embittered by that time about the Hillsdale administration and message. I think we were just trying to prove a point. No one was around, but we were definitely naked on the steps of Central Hall, just showing that we could."

They despised Mu Alpha.

"They sucked. I'm sure they still suck," Frank said. "They were really lame and extremely conservative. They were the kind of people who would be in Latin class and recite Latin with a British accent. They liked to take their shoes off. Just lame, offensively lame. I'm sure they still are."

"We stole their door once," he continued. "We buried it in the woods somewhere."

According to Boylan, several Mu Alphas watched as The Beat guys unscrewed the door from the house and carried it away. Apparently, they didn't seem mad.

"They were more in shock that somebody had the guts to walk in, unscrew the door and walk out," she said. "I don't think they ever got their door back."

She doesn't remember the perpetrators facing any punishment from the administration.

Despite the party crashing, The Beat's inhabitants threw plenty of their own parties. They all agreed the Crunk Party was the best.

"We thought that it was a real shame that Hillsdale was not embracing hip-hop and rap, and so we decided to have a party fix that," Gibbons said.

They got a DJ and a garish wall mural for the party.

"If Salvador Dali had a conversation with Russell Simmons, this is the mural that would have come from that conversation," Gibbons said.

"We made jungle juice and had kegs and some of us got really dressed up for the occasion, meaning, I got really dressed up for the occasion," Boylan said. "Dave and Jon got naked. Everybody got extremely drunk."

Over 300 students attended over the course of the night.

"If we had anything that makes us legacy-worthy, this party is it," Gibbons said.

They had plenty of smaller events, including Beat poetry readings featuring the works of writers like Allen Ginsberg and Jack Kerouac every spring and toga parties. They also had a strong appreciation for any social event that did not require pants.

"We started buying a gallon of ice cream and eating it on our front porch in our underwear," Gibbons said. "People would come over, and since we didn't want them to feel left out we would ask them to remove their pants. You don't need pants to be a human being. We were reminding people of their humanity."

The house also had a reputation for messiness.

"The dishes were always very dirty and piled up because our dishwasher never worked. We were lazy and had the convenience of a dishwasher that didn't work," Gibbons said. "We could say, 'If only our dishwasher worked!' It was a lie. At some point, we would throw the dishes away, or we would break them and throw them away."

"There were people who preferred going to the Salvation Army to buy clothes to actually washing the clothes they already had," Gibbons continued.

The mess scared some girls away.

"There was trash everywhere, it was very gross. Girls are generally a little more clean, so they didn't like it," Frank said.

The mess didn't bother the stray cats that the guys befriended. One, named Nell, showed up in the house one day. Gibbons described her as "very polite." She liked to sit on the guys' laps while they did homework.

Another, named Mr. Fluffington, was not allowed in the house because he had mange and a bum eye. Despite his infirmities, he won their affection.

"Everyone was impressed because he wasn't neutered," Frank said. "He was very loved."

The house's camaraderie affected each of its members. About six of them got tattoos of the phrase "So it goes" from Kurt Vonnegut's novel "Slaughterhouse-Five" in memory of their time living together.

"It's important that there's an off-campus place for people a little bit on the outside -- not really sure they made the right decision going to Hillsdale -- that can give them a place to celebrate," Frank said.

2009-03-26T12:52:00.001-04:00

Here it is:

Read the article.

2009-03-12T23:58:00.002-04:00

Look for another Collegian article about The Beat.

I just got interviewed by a girl about it. She said it was run along side a story about The Bench. I told her The Benched sucked.

2009-03-10T22:16:00.001-04:00

i think this blog is dead now. Comments?

2009-03-02T00:00:00.002-05:00

To all the Beats and the Whole Sick Crew,
boys and girls,
the would-bes, the wanna-bes and the weres,
to all who ever said they'd be with me and Rockland
and all who raved with me, hysterical or naked at Hillsdale:

Come to my wedding.

Obviously, this could only happen once.

ST. John's Episcopal Church
College Park, Ga.
March 21 @ 2 p.m.

2009-01-05T03:58:00.002-05:00

From Tübingen

I saw a mannequin yesterday, in one of the windows here, that looked exactly like Gibbons. Except it didn't have a head. But it was dressed like him. And it was standing like him. And had that same sort of lithe-fey look thing he had.

I said, Hey, that mannequin looks like my friend Jon, and the person with me asked me if my friend was OK, being headless.

Tübingeners, it should be said, celebrate in a very Beat way. The New Years Eve event reminded me a lot of Lee. It involved fireworks, fired off randomly and without any sort of timing, five minutes before midnight and 10 minutes after. The roof of a house build in the middle ages caught on fire.

If Lee had been there, there would have been more things shouted, but that was the sort of night it was. Also, there's a big tree in the middle of the square (marktplatz), and a small sick crew spent an hour, at least, shooting bottle rockets into the branches and setting off fire fountains beneath the boughs. I figure they don't know that liquor is flammable, or they never asked themselves what Bob would do, or maybe they never had anything like that ridiculous, burning stuff Harvey used to bring out of the mountains.

Anyway, you guys would have liked the madness here.

2008-12-08T13:06:00.005-05:00

I was going to leave this as a comment on Perry's blog but sometimes it is intimidating leaving comments places where people who are probably wittier than you might read them. Fuck all.

Everytime I get a call from someone, I try to write down their number and the date they called, because I want to keep the numbers up-to-date and I don't trust my office phone's memory or my cell phone's address list. I have many pieces of paper lying about my office with scribbled names, dates and numbers on them...I think it freaks people out. I try not to answer my phone unless I know who it is, in order to make sure, I have to reference my scribbled notes, which takes too fucking long...thus the person ends up leaving a message, which I don't want to listen to because it will be so fucking long and their number may or may not be at the end of it.

I'm growing a beard, I'm going for that Ted Kaczynski look (I almost didn't include that part because I wasn't sure how to spell Kaczynski). I also wear a waist coat sometimes but it isn't as cool you would think. I realized this weekend that I hadn't worn jeans in over a month...I immediatly retrieved a pair from my dresser and put them on, fearing that if I didn't, I would start laughing on the inhale.

2008-12-05T21:15:00.000-05:00

The Beat, circa 1892, w/ hats.

2008-11-23T11:22:00.003-05:00

I don't need to tell you that this photo collection of students from Patrick Henry College called Right: Portraits from the Evangelical Ivy League by (my brother?) Jona Frank hits a little too close to home.

Here's a selected photo essay from Mother Jones. The interviews with some of the students are amazing — though, as you'll read, you've already met them all.

Like Shant Boyajian, 20. President of the Patrick Henry College Republicans.

"I came to the school because of the education and the professors and particularly because it was offering a Christian education from a classic liberal arts perspective."

2008-11-19T18:40:00.002-05:00

Yo ho ho

What is it, exaclty, about Hillsdale and pirates?

There is Dr. Arnn's known association with pirates, dating from the start of his tenure as president, then there's Peter Leeson's Austrian-buccaneer economics and now Hillsdale alum Erik Prince is going to have his mercenary company, Blackwater, fight pirates?

What the hell people.

2008-11-13T11:19:00.003-05:00

Reading on the current 1st ammendment case in the Supreme Court, I have to wonder why some of the Beat Boys haven't converted to Summum.

I mean come on. Gibs? The third aphorism is about vibration.

2008-10-15T13:30:00.002-04:00

According to Stephen Colbert, part of the economic crisis is due to computers, which are programed to dump stock (for example) at times when humans might hang on. Some ridiculous percentage of the stock market is actually computer-run. This, for me, revives questions about whether it's really a bad idea to attack machines that do human-like jobs. Maybe if we'd all started stabbing automatic vacuums when I said we should, we'd be okay now ....

You know they're evil

2008-10-04T11:28:00.004-04:00

Say what you will about Hillsdale College (I will, thank you), but Arnn is actually a good sport. After generations of getting called a pirate, for no real reason, getting a pirates flag flown from his office window (we suspect Bob, obviously), and having himself refered to as Arrrrrrrrn, he's gone ahead and accepted the joke. A tamed down version, clearly, but still, according to the Collegian, Arnn presides over an annual pirate party.

In other Collegian news, Hillsdale Hardcore is lamer than I remember. And the Manning Street racists are ridiculously aggressive.

On the other hand, Hillsdale homophobia is exactly as I remember, as you can see in the perfectly expressed in this awful driblet:

Heneveld wasn't "losing his morals,"- his Facebook "Interested In" status clearly states "women."

2008-09-20T23:46:00.002-04:00

I talked to Dr. Scalia on Wednesday. He is over in Baltimore these days. He inquired about his Post Modern Students and I gave him the updates I had. Also, he was the volume editor for the Bloom's Critical Companion to Emerson, and I think he has a few other books/chapters coming out in the near future.

By the way, does anyone happen to know what became of the Post Modern video? I'd like a copy before it gets too lost.

2008-09-10T23:47:00.003-04:00

In the early morning and late night hours, the Danger Cart and Beat door/flag, respectively, were "liberated" by three brave, anonymous souls. They're undergoing treatment to preserve their status as historical relics, and shall be proudly displayed as such.

Let September 10, 2008, then, stand in history as "Beat Reclamation Day."

Also, happy early birthday, Hugger.

2008-09-06T23:18:00.002-04:00

The Beat's door, with all the signatures, is in the basement of a house. The last remnants of The Wake, children of The Bench, live there.

It's being used for beer pong.

Sad day.

2008-08-25T03:09:00.006-04:00

Someone reminded me about Scoutmaster and former Hillsdale College student/theocrat Hans Zeiger so I wanted to see what he doing now in light of being cut off from the warm nationalist paternal love-milk of his alma mater.

Turns out he has out-Zeigered himself and is now writing (at least part-time) for an Orthodox Anglican publication called, and I am not making this up, Virtue Online.

Since Zeiger, who claims to be stationed in Canterbury, and other writers for the site aren't reporting any news other media don't have, it seems the only purpose of Virtue Online is to elaborate on what they see as the sinfulness of gay people, people who don't hate gay people and, especially, other Anglicans who don't hate gay people.

His blogs and columns have stopped, though the Virtue Online articles could arguably be a violation of his promise to stop writing about current events. As he said in a January 2007 column:

In most activities of life, silence is the prudent thing. If words are to be used, let them be about the Savior of mankind whose incarnation we have just celebrated. Of Him, may we speak as fervently, as humbly, to one soul as we write to thousands.

Anyone else heard of any news, stories or travels of Zeiger or the Zeigerish peoples?

2008-07-09T11:36:00.003-04:00

I have become engaged. To a woman no less. The wedding will be June or July of next summer after she finishes her thesis on elements of literary criticism in Poe's detective short stories, and after I get back from Argentina.

2008-07-06T22:36:00.001-04:00

2008-06-30T12:31:00.002-04:00

For those of you who swooned @ Ron Paul, any thoughts of what you'll do come November? Thoughts about the capital-L Libertarians and Bob Barr?

2008-06-11T19:14:00.002-04:00

Favorite word today: Swag. Meaning: Stolen shit,
or, stuff that was once pretty valuable but now is sort of 25 cents on the dollar, but maybe it's worth something to someone.

Allegedly, the word's police report jargon for "Stolen Without A Gun," though that's obviously fiction. Fun though.

Also ... because Bush is almost gone
& because I keep finding myself sucked into politics
& because
I can:

2008-06-05T16:00:00.004-04:00

Overheard in Hillsdale, Michigan:

Ignoramus: You hear Osama's going to be the front runner for the democrats?

Bemused: ...

Ignoramus: (repeats) You know Osama's the front runner for the democrats now?

Bemused: Osama?

Ignoramus: Yeah. Baraka.

Bemused: Oh, him.

Ignoramus: The White House ain't gonna be white anymore.

Bemused: ...

Ignoramus: He's gonna get his disco ball up.

2008-05-30T19:13:00.002-04:00

I live in a country where, 7 years ago, the government seized virtually every bank account in the country--denying people access to their money--and later returning (if one was so lucky) only a third of it. The government routinely denies the visible, palpable inflation and relentlessly increasing poverty rates. There is no abortion, except in back allies in "villas miserias"--shantytowns built using whatever people can slap together. These, my friends, are problems.

I do, however, know that a scarf is not a problem. What the fuck is this?

2008-05-29T15:27:00.000-04:00

For Dave

2008-05-09T11:13:00.002-04:00

2008-04-30T08:24:00.002-04:00

I think Farnham needs some of these....and Dr. JJ

Someone has been watching too much SNL.

2008-04-18T22:10:00.008-04:00

'I'm a big fan of Radio Control'

One Valentine's Day, Hugger and I watched that movie with Paul Giamatti about the guy who lived in Cleveland, was really sad, and drew a series of comics about how sad his life was. American Splendor, about Harvey Pekar. I remember we went to the video store and every movie about anything remotely related to love was checked out, even "Assassination Tango" and Maggie Gyllenhaal's S&M-romantic comedy.

Not that we were looking for a romantic movie, but the shelves were wiped and the desperation of that was sort of stark.

So we got this really really sad movie about a really really sad man, who seemed a lot like my friends, and a lot like me.

Case in point: Hugger didn't watch the movie, because he was drinking peach schnapps and had been drinking peach schnapps since he woke up that morning. He will claim that this has nothing to do with the fact he was spending Valentine's Day with me, but he's full of shit.

The movie really depressed me. Not because Pekar was pathetic or lonely or sad, but because he didn't have any fight left in him. I wanted to have some way to fight back, even if I was pathetic, some way to hope things could be better, even if that made me pathetic. This is why I thought American Splendor was sad, but thought Love Liza, with Philip Seymore Hoffman, was beautiful. Dave Frank used to try to push that movie on people.

I really like it, he would say. I just really like it.

Dave and I didn't watch that movie together, so every time he told me he really liked it, I would say I did too.

Did you see it? he would say, and he would point at me. Dave always pointed at me, his hand like a pretend gun, like I wouldn't know he was talking to me unless he pointed.

Yes, I would say. I did.

I really like it, Dave would say. I mean, I really like it. A lot of people didn't like it. They were like, 'this is sad,' but I just really thought it was good. It was a good sad.

Hoffman's character in the movie, Wilson, thinks that Radio Control planes could save him. He tries to get over his wife's suicide and his addiction to huffing gas by becoming a fan of Radio Control. He was really really sad and lonely and pathetic, and seemed a lot like my friends and a lot like me, but maybe more than Pekar, because he had some kind of hope. He could get excited about things and in one scene he goes crashing into a lake, just so he can tell people that he has an identity.

Do you know who I am? he says. I am a big fan of Radio Control.

I thought he was going to say he lived at the Beat.

I was thinking about this when I read Dave's last column. I really like Dave's columns. He makes himself sound sad, like what my mom would have said was sadsack, though I don't know exactly what that is. But like that. Except he also has that kid-like consternation, and he sounds really sweet, which was always Dave's big secret.

In every one of his columns, I keep wondering if Dave's going to suddenly get excited and start yelling that he loves Radio Control. If he ever does, I hope someone's there to tell him they do too.

2008-04-08T19:53:00.002-04:00

From the leaked script of Oliver Stone's movie about George Bush, an oddly Beat scene:

After being accepted to Harvard Business School, W. downs a pint of Wild Turkey, drives onto the lawn of his parents' Washington, D.C., home, and challenges his daddy to a boxing match.

George Sr. is pretty reasonable: "My advice to you—go to an AA meeting."

George W. is pretty adolescent: "Thank you, Mr. Perfect. Mr. War Hero. Mr. Fucking-God-Almighty."

2008-03-31T20:48:00.001-04:00

I just clicked "edit page" under the disambiguation page for "the beat" and added a quick line. It will probably be gone tomorrow. Maybe I'll assign it as homework or extra credit next semester. Ah the joys of having sla.. Students.

2008-03-18T20:55:00.005-04:00

Hello everyone, this is my son, Ezra.

Also, I would like to second Dave's Wikipedia and Flickr suggestions. I also think we should get together in the Midwest in August, or at least all make it to ~~the next Beat reunion~~ Silliman's wedding.

Also, I liked how most people that were at the Beat and didn't live there could never really tell who lived there, like it didn't matter.

Also, have you guys heard of bershon? photos here

2008-03-16T12:25:00.004-04:00

Welcome to the new American Police State.

I wish more communities had people like John Adams.

2008-03-16T08:07:00.025-04:00

"Love, Marital Aids and Forgiveness"
or
"The Longest Beat Post Ever"

I.

The history of love, The Beat and Dave Frank will have begun five years ago this November, a little more than two years before the Crunk Party and roughly a year following my institutionalization.

From a 2003 post by Will:

"Dave Frank is the man I hate to love. I'm not at all kidding when I call him a Gary or say he's the biggest tool I know."
-Will

"I can't put my figure on what kind of idiot Dave Frank is exactly. He's like a posing poser who hates the posers. It's like 'The personality traits I stole from someone else are cool, but yours suck. And not just cuz its different.'"
-Prosp3ct

"[I]f any one ever figures out Dave Frank, I am afraid we are going to have to kill them and their family lest this information get out [and] the universe implode."
-Lee

"As I just wrote on my blog, the world has a mixed opinion about Dave Frank. God sees both sides of the issue."
-Silliman

"Every day I drive past a gas station called 'Prospect Service Station.' Even though I have never met Prosp3ct, not do I know his real name, he seems the kind of fellow who would get 'The Cute' seal of approval. I am not so certain the same could be said about Dave, however."
-Sarah Hempel

But, as we all know, the love grew, and I often feel what Silliman described the summer before the Beat Class of 2006 entered its senior year.

II.

1.) I know it's been called for before, but does someone who is less lazy than me want start a Beat wikpedia entry? I promise to participate in resulting hijinks.

2.) Does someone know how to start an online Beat photo album where anyone of us can add shit? Maybe you can do it on flickr, I don't know because I don't have an account.

I can do a photo blog or whatever, but I didn't know what was the best way. There's tons of Beat pictures and memorabilia on facebook, this blog and spread around the internet (and inside Beatnik bedroom drawers which often share space with Eastern European pornography collections).

It would be nice to have all that stuff available in one place for posterity and women seeking marital aids.

3.) Can we update the links to the blogs that don't work? Obviously this is contingent on there being new blogs to replace the old ones, but send Will the link if you got one.

4.) Is there any other Beatniks or known associates (i.e. Luke, Hugger, Green) who have blogs we should link to?

5.) Could Will or whoever put up a picture of the house where the list of current Beat residents now is? Or/also maybe make a list that has each year the Beat was alive with the guys living there at the time.

6.) Can anyone think of an epigraph to be included in an award-winning account of The Beat that will be written by a precocious graduate student during the literary revival of the mid-21st century?

7.) August, I got your call Friday but was at work and then was walking around Virginia City yesterday and I don't get coverage there because my phone sucks. I'll call you today.

III.

This reminds me that it's time for all Beatniks to forgive each other.

It's very late in the West.

"Carl Solomon! I'm with you in Rockland where you're madder than I am/ I'm with you in Rockland where you must feel very strange."

-Ginsberg

2008-03-11T09:54:00.001-04:00

Before a crazy mob?

beatnik questionnaire

2008-03-08T21:45:00.004-05:00

Dylan Lindgren, 30 March 1985 - 8 March 2008

At 4:30am, Dylan "EZ D" Lindgren passed away after a prolonged battle against Hodgkin's lymphoma.

May he rest in peace.

2008-03-07T23:34:00.004-05:00

Mea culpa.
Apologies for the sudden disappearance of comments. In attempting to restore access to the archives, HaloScan stuff disappeared. I still have a copy of the old, now defunct, template, if somebody better than I am with HTML and CSS wants to give it a go. In the meantime, there's always Blogger-powered commenting?

2008-03-07T13:25:00.001-05:00

The Collegian featured The BEAT this past week. Check it out here.

2008-03-01T22:19:00.005-05:00

Dylan's condition is not well. From the Facebook group “Dylan Lindgren”:

Dylan has been in the hospital since the beginning of February. The doctors have now given him at most ten days. He has declined any further treatment from the doctors, opting to spend his last days as alert and unfettered as possible so that he can talk to friends and family. They are trying to keep him as comfortable as possible with morphine, however, his breathing is very labored and he has difficulty holding his head up. He is alert as of right now, and can follow conversations.
Thanks to everyone for showing how much you love and care for Dylan. He is truly grateful for all you've done for him and, I think, genuinely surprised to know we all care about him so much.
During this really difficult time, please keep Dylan and his family and friends in your prayers.

Today Oatess, Dunn, Naomi, and I visited him at Henry Ford Hospital in Detroit. August was there, and Ryan is coming later. Dylan was too weak to laugh or tell stories but his good nature and inner strength is unflappable as always.

2008-02-20T14:45:00.002-05:00

Gentlemen, I am engaged.

So it goes.

A ring was produced from the hand of a naked and trembling and kneeling Jon Gibbons about two weeks ago. We're both very happy.

2008-02-16T03:28:00.000-05:00

Not even kidding, Jon's long-lost brother:

http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendid=21684047

2008-02-09T04:36:00.000-05:00

I watched this video a lot as a young Baptist.
Jon might recall it as well.

Carmen
"Satan Bite the Dust"

2008-01-27T09:22:00.000-05:00

Nerd questions.

1.) Has anyone found a good continental philosophy blog?

2.) Does anyone know of a group that advocates nonviolence resistance in opposition to American bases around the world? I'm not just asking because I'm trying to speed up the looming battle between Lee Nunn and myself.

2008-01-18T18:50:00.000-05:00

I definitely have these moments of, "Am I an adult now?" We have guest towels. You know ... Amber has these towels I'm not allowed to use unless we have guests over. When guests come over we get them out. That seems like that's a pretty big sign. But then, you know, we drank two cases of PBR this weekend.

- Lee Nunn on the existential problem of guest towels

2008-01-13T04:33:00.000-05:00

Also, what the fuck is everyone up to?

Place, profession and a given experience. Maybe a current or recent book.

Me.

-Carson City, Nevada.
-Reporter, writer.
-Me and Jen went sledding on a mountain near Lake Tahoe this Saturday and made a snow sculpture of a giant penis.
-"Amerika" by Kafka.

2008-01-13T04:25:00.000-05:00

This documentary rocked my sack. It's the same guy who did "Hoop Dreams."

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0334416/
http://www.steviethemovie.com/

2008-01-09T17:17:00.001-05:00

I just want to say, in response to Juno (excellent film)...We liked the Moldy Peaches before they were hip.

Who's got the crack?

2008-01-03T11:54:00.000-05:00

Totally unsupported caucus predictions:

Obama beats Clinton, but within the margin of error. Edwards, not knocked out, joins forces with Richardson. Kusinich claims victory, no one knows for what, and Shirley MacClaine agrees.

McCain gets a surge, though not a win. Huckabee takes it, leaving the party split between McCain and Huckabee. Limbaugh gets mad, Huckabee becomes the GOP version of Howard Dean, and Romney takes the nomination. Gulliani says something something 9/11 something terrorists win.

At least one Ron Paul supporter, possibly while tagging the side of the tallest building in Iowa, is shot by a police officer. He will later claim to have been attacked by UN-sponsored riot police.

2007-12-20T18:30:00.000-05:00

Forgotten Google bomb

Even though I once, very solemnly and symbolically, flipped off the tower. Even though I fought with the administration and the dean of men called me nasty names. Even though I disagreed w/ all sorts of things about Hillsdale. I really never meant to come out at the top of this google seach.

2007-12-17T02:20:00.000-05:00

2007-12-01T15:38:00.000-05:00

Or possibly Lee and Amber's Thanksgiving?

2007-11-24T21:36:00.000-05:00

The Beat 20 year reunion spa party?

The Man Can...

2007-11-24T03:27:00.000-05:00

From the web site All True Bible Stories For Children:

"Mother," Beth interrupted again. "If they are supposed to be spying, why are they visiting a prostitute? I thought that a prostitute was a woman who would let any man put his penis in her so long as he left her a bunch of money on the table by her bed?"
"That is true, Dear One," answered Beth's mother, "but sometimes spies must do strange things to get the job done. Now please, let me tell the story."

2007-11-18T03:13:00.000-05:00

Molly: "Luke, if he had stayed a bachelor in 1986 and was a cocaine addict."

2007-11-16T21:34:00.000-05:00

Yeah, even though the Beat is dead, some of us truly lived up to the "legends" thing. And the "sad," "depressed," "hilarious," "homoerotic," and "creepy" things.

All of which is remembered: Conquering campus; student streakers left mark on steps of Central Hall: Irregular, possibly unnatural hairgrowth; a thwarted Sigma Chi raid lands two streakers at college landmark

Gibbs takes the 'no pants party' to a new level

As someone said about something else: It was "not about hipsters looking for kicks, or about subversives and nonconformists, rebels without a cause who point the way for the radicals... not an anti-intellectual celebration of spontaneity or an artifact of literary primitivism. It's a sad and somewhat self-consciously lyrical story about loneliness, insecurity, and failure. It's also a story about guys who want to be with other guys."

2007-11-11T10:32:00.000-05:00

Here's the new Collegian web site, and you can see he redesigned pages here.

2007-10-24T18:56:00.000-04:00

Including myself

Dave continues his quest to personally report on everything said to be sinful, except in Nevada, where the response is more like "Oh."

From the Nevada Appeal:

I didn't know I liked the drink until I tasted one so I could show my friend how disgusting it was.

"One time," I told my friend, "my dad punished me by making me drink a V8."

My friend said I didn't know what I was talking about and that a Bloody Mary isn't a V8.

"It is a V8," I said, "and no one actually likes drinking a V8."

Then I drank the Bloody Mary.

"Oh," I thought.

2007-10-13T22:15:00.001-04:00

2007-10-09T10:41:00.000-04:00

Dave: 'Arm the sea cows for self defense'

According to NPR, the Beat's beloved Manatees could soon have to fend for themselves in Florida:

Wildlife officials in Florida want to "downlist" the manatee, moving its status from "endangered" to "threatened."

Supporters of the move say it's a sign of the Florida manatee's comeback. Environmental groups say it has more to do with the influence of developers.

As gentle vegetarians that spend most of their time foraging in rivers and bays for sea grass, manatees have no natural predators. But they do face significant danger — mostly from power boats and their propellers.

2007-10-04T10:13:00.000-04:00

And now, Denver is lonesome for her heroes.
Beat Night on the intertubes.

2007-10-01T13:28:00.000-04:00

I realize I don't really look forward to anything.

Not going to sleep.
Not getting up.
Not going to work.
Not coming home from work.
Not the weekend.

I just sort of live.

2007-09-30T09:23:00.000-04:00

This pretty much sums up the Beat as I knew it:

"[On the Road] is not about hipsters looking for kicks, or about subversives and nonconformists, rebels without a cause who point the way for the radicals of the nineteen sixties. And the book is not an anti-intellectual celebration of spontaneity or an artifact of literary primitivism. It's a sad and somewhat self-consciously lyrical story about loneliness, insecurity, and failure. It's also a story about guys who want to be with other guys."

--"Drive, He Wrote: What the Beats were about" by Louis Menand, The New Yorker, Oct. 1, 2007

(the article also has a nice section on the homoerotic tension that was most often realized through girlfriend swapping)

2007-09-27T11:09:00.000-04:00

Is the Collegian ever going to be published online again? It is the same damn page from this summer still.

2007-09-18T21:45:00.000-04:00

Lee who?

I either have to assume that this -- While there were many highlights to the week long trip, the [White House] Fellows were especially appreciative of Lee Nunn. Aside from assisting with planning and logistics, Lee also introduced the Fellows to wild jumping salmon and the grizzly bears who love to eat them ... He told stories ranging from his tour in Vietnam to his fellowship in the Nixon administration and beyond. Yes, Fellows…There is life after the fellowship. With his actions, Lee set a high bar for this class as it transitions to alumni status. -- is not our Lee Nunn. Or I have to believe that he's taken his "mama bear" powers and chosen to use them for a chummy, lets-all-sing-a-chorus-of-he's-a-jolly-good-fellow type evil.

Lee, if you're going to betray us for evil, it better not be a salmon-watching trip for some suits. Also, I demand stories ranging from your time with Nixon to your days in 'Nam.

And Dave says, "Yatchs?"

Photo by Tony Gonzalez

2007-09-12T09:11:00.000-04:00

Congratulations to Lukey2Beers, who is/is-going-to-be a father.

2007-09-05T10:15:00.000-04:00

Thank you, Molly Moore. "The thorn in your hangover is a wild rose from Ireland."

2007-08-22T23:57:00.000-04:00

The Scoop on the Beat house

We've moved out. Can't find enough people. Jon D. and I live at 219 N. Manning. Chase and Econ live at Parkplace. Dylan's at home with cancer. August is lost in a sea of registration tables, residence unknown.

Hard times have befallen Guertin, who is charging us around a thousand dollars worth of damages.

The flag, pictures and door are secure.

2007-08-11T22:49:00.000-04:00

Gentlemen,

I am more than a little drunk....

I miss ya'll.

So it goes.

2007-07-24T21:59:00.000-04:00

"I've always been mellow."
"I'm as confused as you are."
"I think the problem is, basically, we've totally outgrown the two-party system."
- Chuck D., talking to me tonight.

2007-06-19T01:36:00.000-04:00

Anderson Cooper is a total nutrug.

2007-05-16T22:37:00.000-04:00

I just bought a "new" car. I'm going to drive it home and totally destroy it in a misguided attempt to convert it to run on waste vegitable oil. I don't have Bob's number or else I would call him so that he can laugh at me. If, by some freak accident, it happens to work, then I'll be taking a cross country trip in September if anyone is free and feels like getting lost and stranded in the desert. -HARVY

2007-04-26T16:50:00.000-04:00

I got a job here.

When is graduation or any parties thereafter? I might be able to stop by if it is May 11-17.

"But I reckon I got to light out for the Territory ahead of the rest, because Aunt Sally she's going to adopt me and sivilize me, and I can't stand it. I been there before."

2007-04-12T06:58:00.000-04:00

Vonnegut is dead.

So it goes.

2007-03-18T09:36:00.000-04:00

Mais nous étions hypes.

Malitia reboot

2007-03-04T15:48:00.000-05:00

A: "We never get invited to potluck dinners."
L:(doing impression of potential potluck dinner host) "'They tell fat jokes...'"
A:(also doing impression of potential potluck dinner host) "'Their conversation is peppered with racial slurs.'"

-laughing-

*smack*
L:"And that, honey, is why you don't mess with the WARRIOR! YEAH!"

2007-02-27T20:10:00.000-05:00

Desperate Times...

So it goes... the Beat once again appears to be on the brink of collapse.

If you were concerned about a violation of tradition, I understand. For all I know, it might be a big feast day, and the high-church folk can drink. But it's not about drinking. Well, maybe it is a little (or a lot).

The situation is three members are moving on. And the landlord wants some names, and I haven't got any. And there's still some uncertainty about Dylan and August. I was about to wash my hands of the place, but I was convinced to give things another try.

I'm going to use this party to reassert the Beat ethos into the community here. Hopefully, I can attract some new members to help carry on.

If some of you were planning to come, and you assumed it would take place in late April or early May, condolences. But if you are free, come on the 9th.

2007-02-07T10:35:00.000-05:00

I'd like to organize a cross-continental expedition to Cape Disappointment (1, 2, 3, 4).

Fuck your grief.

2007-02-04T16:18:00.001-05:00

The record label is "Fat Fish Music".
The babies look scared as shit (especially the one on the left), like there's a douchebag from Full House hovering over them or something.
Why is he sleeping in a bed in a New Mexico adobe palace court yard?
The black choir is just gratuitous.
That guy playing bongos is so into it.
Is that a monastery they're in?
And he's naked in the there with the babies.
They're not even going into a bath or anything.
Oh, Beach Boys.
I like the "goof off" moments.
He's wearing white jean overalls at one point.
And trapped in a film strip.
2:06, I think they show the baby's genitals. No, I wasn't looking. Shut the fuck up.
That keyboard player has a sweet vest.

2007-01-16T11:03:00.000-05:00

As I recall, the door was first signed in 2000, or maybe 2001. It's filled up a bit in 6 or 7 years.

2007-01-02T12:34:00.000-05:00

2006-12-22T18:06:00.000-05:00

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kancho

2006-12-22T15:31:00.000-05:00

Jack says everyone must see this before they die:

2006-12-21T19:27:00.000-05:00

2006-12-15T11:23:00.000-05:00

Molly just sent me this. From the Communist Party.

Note:
-Econ in the frozen section.
-"Fast, easy" under the banana sign.
-The irony of "Seafood" in the picture.
-Jon's unnaturally natural way of standing like a woman.
-My poor excuse of felating technique.

2006-12-08T23:18:00.000-05:00

A very Beat Christmas, courtesy of McSweeney's Internet Tendency.

2006-12-08T12:55:00.000-05:00

While looking up "poop" in the Oxford English Dictionary I came across this entry:

poontang, n.

Sexual intercourse, sex; women collectively, or a woman, regarded as a means of sexual gratification. Also attrib. Hence as v. intr., to copulate.

1929 T. WOLFE Look Homeward, Angel 343 A fellow's got to have a little Poon Tang.

1947 C. WILLINGHAM End as Man II. vii. 78 Poley looked out the window and saw a pretty Negro girl on the sidewalk... ‘Eye that poon tang there,’ he said.

1959 R. CONDON Manchurian Candidate ii. 21 Every now and then I think about you coming all the way to Korea from New Jersey to get your first piece of poontang.

1966 C. HINES Heat's On xv. 122 That ain't our racket. We just sells poontang here.

1968 E. J. GAINES Bloodline 144 Yesterday this time I was poon~tanging like a dog.

1970 D. DODGE Hatchetman x. 127 ‘Is it true what they say about gook women?’..‘I heah it changes youah luck, though. Like black poontang.’

1972 ‘T. COE’ Don't lie to Me iv. 44 May be you're some kind of poontang sex maniac.

1972 Listener 22 June 845/2 Massa gonna smack yo black ass, nigger. You can't go chasing white poontang all night long.

1976 Honolulu Star-Bull. 21 Dec. E-10/6 (Advt.), The other girls majored in home ec...but Debby majored in Poon-tang.

2006-12-05T18:46:00.000-05:00

Despite the bad times at The Beat recently, there still is good news and glad tidings: our LORD now has a permanent presence among us. Thanks to Zach the Pirate and his theatre goonies The Beat is equipped with a giant cross which, as you can see, now hangs from the ceiling. If only we knew someone to play the organ for our in-house services...

2006-12-04T02:17:00.000-05:00

Dylan has cancer.

(The following is what I've heard from August and subject to his revision)

Dylan has stage 4 Hodgkin's disease, which is a form of lymphoma.

Stage 4 is highly advanced, meaning it involves other organs besides the lymph nodes. Dylan apparently has a growth in his lungs.

The average recovery/remission rate is 80-85% for Stage 4 Hodgkins. The good part is that it is a very localized growth and hasn't spread to any other place, which is much more difficult to treat. The fact that Dylan is younger bodes well for him as well.

If you know him, I think Dylan's character as a human being really speaks for itself. All our thoughts and prayers are with him and his family. I'll try to find some contact information and post it this week, so we can write and visit him.

2006-12-03T01:32:00.000-05:00

Tonight The Beat decided to have a bit of a bonfire. One of the Beat sofas and that disgusting floral print chair that everyone left for dead at the beginning of the year are officially a pile of ash.

Taken from the roof.

2006-12-02T18:38:00.000-05:00

Yeeha!

2006-12-01T22:55:00.000-05:00

Every good Beat will get to die to this song.